Life Lessons

In 2000 I put a pot of grease on to get hot to make some French fries. Unfortunately, I was using a pot that is designed to get extremely hot, FAST. I had forgotten that. I went downstairs to make a phone call… the person wasn’t there so I left a quick message and came back to the kitchen to find a ROARING fire in the pot. I was at a complete loss as to what to do. Long story, short… it started blazing up the wall and I knew there was no way I could do anything to stop it so I went back downstairs to call 911. I left the house from downstairs, walked around the house and was going to go back in and try to find my cats. By the time I got to the front door the entire house was filled with black smoke, I couldn’t go in.



My cats had not suffered! PRAISE GOD!!! I didn’t cry again.

To be continued….

One day I was reading the story of Jesus at the wedding feast and his first miracle. When I got to the place where Mary tells the servants to do whatever he says I had a “Suddenly”. A sudden revelation…. That’s it! WHATEVER HE SAYS DO IT! Seems so simple now, well duh?! But that has been my motto since that day. WHATEVER HE SAYS DO IT.

1On the third day a wedding took place at Cana in Galilee. Jesus' mother was there, 2and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding. 3When the wine was gone, Jesus' mother said to him, "They have no more wine." 4"Dear woman, why do you involve me?" Jesus replied, "My time has not yet come."
5His mother said to the servants, "Do whatever he tells you."
6Nearby stood six stone water jars, the kind used by the Jews for ceremonial washing, each holding from twenty to thirty gallons.
7Jesus said to the servants, "Fill the jars with water"; so they filled them to the brim.
8Then he told them, "Now draw some out and take it to the master of the banquet."
They did so, 9and the master of the banquet tasted the water that had been turned into wine. He did not realize where it had come from, though the servants who had drawn the water knew. Then he called the bridegroom aside 10and said, "Everyone brings out the choice wine first and then the cheaper wine after the guests have had too much to drink; but you have saved the best till now."


11This, the first of his miraculous signs, Jesus performed in Cana of Galilee. He thus revealed his glory, and his disciples put their faith in him.(John 2:1-11)

I started thinking about all the different stories in the Bible where people DID do what the Lord told them to, and all the ones that DIDN'T.  Each had a result.


The Lord told Adam and Eve not to eat from the tree in the middle of the garden... they did and we have all been paying for it since!


The Lord told Joshua to march around Jericho ... he did and the walls came tumbling down!

At least four days this week I have woken up with the Spirit singing to my spirit:

And I will rise when He calls my name
No more sorrow, no more pain
I will rise on eagles' wings
Before my God fall on my knees
And rise
I will rise"

At first, I didn't know what it was or where I had heard it... then I realized that I had been listening to MP's latest CD so it must be on it...sure enough, "I Will Rise" was track 8.... not one that I even focused on....You know, it's one of those songs you have to get past to get to the one you really want to listen to ...  When I woke up to the song again this morning I decided to find all the words:

'I Will Rise' - Chris Thomlin

There's a peace I've come to know

Though my heart and flesh may fail

There's an anchor for my soul

I can say 'It is well'

Jesus has overcome

And the grave is overwhelmed

The victory is won

He is risen from the dead

[Chorus:]

And I will rise when He calls my name

No more sorrow, no more pain

I will rise on eagles' wings

Before my God fall on my knees

And rise

I will rise

There's a day that's drawing near

When this darkness breaks to light

And the shadows disappear

And my faith shall be my eyes

Jesus has overcome

And the grave is overwhelmed

The victory is won

He is risen from the dead

[Chorus:]

And I will rise when He calls my name

No more sorrow, no more pain

I will rise on eagles' wings

Before my God fall on my knees

And rise

I will rise

And I hear the voice of many angels sing,

'Worthy is the Lamb'

And I hear the cry of every longing heart,

'Worthy is the Lamb'

[x2]

[Chorus:]

And I will rise when He calls my name

No more sorrow, no more pain

I will rise on eagles' wings

Before my God fall on my knees

And rise

I will rise"

In 1998 I was working for AT&T. I had been there 23 years so I was making a REALLY good salary and 7 weeks of vacation.

One day, early in the year, they made an offer I couldn’t refuse. They made a “buy out” offer that almost everyone that was eligible, took.   Like I said, too good to refuse.

However, I was still young and I would have to work somewhere,  so why leave that large salary and lots of vacation?....  It ended up taking me 6 full months to decide! I put out about 20 fleeces, all directing me to leave. THANK GOD FOR HIS PATIENCE!!!


That night, thinking about his offer, I made a life defining decision. I told the Lord that going from $80,000 to $20,000 was huge!... BUT, if that was what the He wanted me to do, I was there! You have to know that was HUGE! If you know me now, 12 years later, that doesn’t seem so "out there", because I tend to say that constantly now, and leaving isn't hard for me anymore … not so then! I said it then, and I meant it!  That opened the doors of heaven spiritually for me!

As it turns out, I didn’t get the job, because my "leave"  date and their "need by" date didn’t match up…  But, it really wasn't about the job, it was about my decision to step-out regardless of the pay difference, if that's what He wanted me to. 

It took a few more fleeces before I made the final, final decision because I didn't get that job, I still wasn't sure if I was suppose to leave.   And, I wanted a job lined up before I did "something stupid"!

That final "LEAVE" decision came when I finally realized that everytime I thought about leaving it was based on faith: "God WILL PROVIDE" and everytime I thought about staying with AT&T it was based on fear: "What if He doesn't!?!"  And, like I said, I wanted that safety net, a job lined up before I decided,  but HE wanted me to make my decision without the safety net. 

That was the beginning of my Abraham experience:
Abraham had no clue where the Lord was taking him, he was just promised provision, so he had to step out in faith and go where the Lord took him.

Here, I am today, 12 years later with ZERO regrets! NONE! Wouldn’t go back! There have been quiet a few years where there was no full time job, or no job at all… but the Lord has ALWAYS provided! Thank You Father GOD!

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Lessons Learned:

- If God has a job for you, He will give you Divine favor! Seriously, I wish you could have seen me that day! I did absolutely NOTHING to get that job offer, but there is was. Because I learned that, anytime I have gone on a job interview it has been completely stress free.

- You won't always know what is next.  He may tell you to leave one place without letting you know what is next.  My experience, so far, is that He RARELY lets you in on the next thing!  NEVER has for me!  He just keeps saying "OK! Time's UP here, time to move on."  But Looooord!! (said with a whiny voice)

- Where God guides He provides. He is my provider! Listen, if YOU give me something, God gets the credit, not you! Because, I know he put it on your heart to give it to me.

Exactly one week ago today, March 11th, I started a page that I called "Why Are You Surprised?".  But, the more I typed the madder I got... I felt very much like what I suspect Jesus felt when he was throwing the money collectors out of the temple.. I was ready so start throwing things! 
I stopped writing it because I felt like I wasn't doing a very good job of expressing myself.  I still have it saved and may have to pull it out for future use, but in the meantime, I got the following email this morning that Dutch Sheets wrote yesterday.  It says what I was trying to say, only much better because I was so angry.  (I will say though, he has a hope for America that I don't share...I think we are at the point where God saves the few and takes out the rest like when he took Lot out of Sodom.  Don't get me wrong, I have every hope in the Lord, but finding enough repentant "Christians" is what concerns me! But, hopefully, he is right .... )

-------------
An Important Message from Dutch Sheets

March 17, 2010

Dear JAMES,
It is 5:00 a.m. I have been up all night praying and agonizing over the condition of America. While praying for the nation in general, and also concerning a gathering this summer to cry out for awakening in America, I felt drawn to the book of Joel. While reading it, this word began to stir in me for our nation. I know it is lengthy, but please read it prayerfully. Not since October of 2000, have I been so burdened for America. At that time I issued a call to prayer, which, due to the favor and anointing of the Lord on it, went viral. Millions received it and prayed. My heart cry is that the same thing happens with this word, for I am actually more burdened now than I was then.

America is in a horrendous crisis of monumental proportions, a season much like Israel in the days of Joel. This Old Testament prophet warned of devastating judgment coming to Israel, but laced the warning with hope and God’s mercy if certain things occurred. That is precisely where we are in America. We Americans are a confident and optimistic people, which is often good, but can also create a dangerous denial and crippling passivity. This is happening with many. But please do not be deceived by those who are saying everything is fine. The truth is that we, as a nation, are in serious trouble. Listen to these words from Joel – they are accurate for us today:

What a day! Doomsday! God’s judgment has come. The strong God has arrived. This is serious business! ... Shake the country up! God’s judgment’s on its way – the Day’s almost here! (Joel 1:15, 2:1; The Message)

The State of the Nation

If God brought corrective but serious judgment to Israel, we are horribly deceived if we think it will not happen to us. If something doesn’t happen to lessen this judgment—and it can be lessened--we are headed for very difficult times. The economy is going to be devastated. The stock market will go well below where it went a few months back—a crash is coming, and soon. More terrorism and violence will occur in our land, perhaps even war. In my spirit I’ve seen buildings crumbling and cities burning. Devastating natural disasters will take place. In general, hard times will be prevalent. Why is this so? Because we have turned from God and His ways. Consider the true condition of America. This assessment is bleak but accurate.

1) Our government is in decay. The current leaders of Congress promote homosexuality, abortion and socialism, while arrogantly ignoring God and the wishes of the people. They are proud, power-hungry, self-serving, career politicians, not the statesmen/women we so desperately need. Our President fits the same description. Along with the above, while honoring—in the White House—the Muslim day of prayer, homosexual activists and a coalition of atheists, he refused to honor the time-honored traditions surrounding the National Day of Prayer. And along with Congress and the President, we have many Judges with no regard for God’s word, the Constitution or our true history. The predictable verdict is in: America is in a moral and spiritual crisis of such magnitude that it is almost unbelievable.

2) What does this look like practically? From my grandparents’ day until now, we have gone from 65% of Americans having a biblical worldview to now 4% of today’s young people sharing these beliefs. This is staggering! Apart from an absolute miracle, which I believe is still possible, we have lost a generation of Americans to Satan and secular humanism. Generally speaking, we are a narcissistic, self-loving nation that has accepted a culture of death, perversion, drugs and violence. We have murdered 51 million babies in the womb and to satisfy the cry for a toleration of immorality and perversion, we are ready to throw away 6000 years of honoring God’s definition of marriage and family.

3) The church, which is supposed to be salt and light for this mess, is neither. Though a remnant has remained faithful, for the most part the church of America has become totally irrelevant and completely ineffective. We have produced lukewarm Christians and a generation that doesn’t know God or His ways. Our pulpits are filled with smiles, not tears; entertainment, not passion; and self-help stories, not prophetic truth. Our feel-good messages and mega fun-centers have anesthetized us to the reality of our condition and, as opposed to offering solutions, are actually part of the problem. We, the church, are not changing our world, we’re being conformed to it. It’s easier to find the truth about our condition as a nation on talk radio than in our churches. We have left our first love and abandoned our cause. In short, an apostate church, an ungodly government and a culture of death, perversion and self-centeredness has earned us an appointment with judgment.

There Is Still Hope for America

But there is still hope. God desires to bring a Third Great Awakening to America. It can be truly amazing – millions saved and delivered; all of society impacted in a huge way; the youth of America finally introduced to the true Christ in all of His power. But please hear me when I say this: “our prayers and actions will determine the magnitude and timing of this awakening; and the level of awakening will determine the magnitude of our judgment. Again, the hope-filled words of the prophet Joel are very pertinent:

12 "Even now," declares the LORD,"return to me with all your heart, with fasting and weeping and mourning."
13 Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the LORD your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity.
14 Who knows? He may turn and have pity and leave behind a blessing— grain offerings and drink offerings for the LORD your God. (Joel 2:12-14)

What powerful words of hope! Re-read them. Our God is so ready to show mercy. But not to the proud and indifferent! The prescription to turn a crisis such as Joel warned of and that which we face today, and the trigger that releases the spirit of awakening to offset it have never changed: repentance, humility, prayer and fasting. Please hear me: This is our only hope for a reduced sentence. Judgment cannot be fully averted but it can be lessened.

A Joel 2 Gathering: Wilderness Outcry

With this in mind, I now believe more fully than ever that a strategy recently given to some colleagues and me is from the Lord. There are and will be numerous opportunities for Americans to gather corporately and cry out to the Lord, but this is one that I know God has ordained and will use greatly. Through dreams and other confirmations, He has spoken and directed several national, spiritual leaders to call for a “Joel 2 gathering.” We are calling for tens of thousands of believers to join us this June 14-18, for 5 days of worship, prayer and some form of fasting (a meal a day, etc.) in Poplar Bluff, Missouri. (Though we will have worship Monday and Friday, the heart of what occurs will be 3 days, Tuesday through Thursday.) Listen once more to the words of the prophet Joel—he articulates what we are calling for:

15 Blow the trumpet in Zion, declare a holy fast, call a sacred assembly.
16 Gather the people, consecrate the assembly; bring together the elders,
gather the children, those nursing at the breast. Let the bridegroom leave his room
and the bride her chamber.
17 Let the priests, who minister before the LORD, weep between the temple porch and the altar. Let them say, "Spare your people, O LORD. Do not make your inheritance an object of scorn, a byword among the nations. Why should they say among the peoples, 'Where is their God?' "
(Joel 2:15-17)

A Call to the Entire Nation

Can you hear the passion and desperation in these words from the prophet? One translation says: “Sound the alarm.” No one was exempt from Joel’s call: spiritual leaders had to come; young and old had to come, even nursing babies; honeymoons had to be postponed! No one was excused. And this sweeping appeal is no less appropriate today. I plead with you to hear the call: we have come to a Joel 2 time in America! So much hangs in the balance! How we respond to Him today will decide what America looks like for the next 50-100 years!

There are several places in the Bible that tell about the Israelites stacking stones to mark an important event...a time when the Lord "shows up and shows off". 

One example of that is in the book of Joshua.  The Lord had just parted the Jordan when it was at its highest, during flood season, to let the Israelites cross over into the promised land:

Joshua 4:19-24 19 On the tenth day of the first month the people went up from the Jordan and camped at Gilgal on the eastern border of Jericho. 20 And Joshua set up at Gilgal the twelve stones they had taken out of the Jordan. 21 He said to the Israelites, "In the future when your descendants ask their fathers, 'What do these stones mean?' 22 tell them, 'Israel crossed the Jordan on dry ground.' 23 For the LORD your God dried up the Jordan before you until you had crossed over. The LORD your God did to the Jordan just what he had done to the Red Sea [a] when he dried it up before us until we had crossed over. 24 He did this so that all the peoples of the earth might know that the hand of the LORD is powerful and so that you might always fear the LORD your God."

When I read that story I thought what a cool way to remember "God Stories" in my own life!  So, I started my own bowl of rocks.  I wrote the date of the event and one word to help remind me of the story.  Now, when anyone sees my bowl of rocks they will ask me "Why" ???  and I am able to testify to the glory of God.  It opens the door of opportunity that may never come ... that wouldn't come up in everyday conversation.  After I tell the story about one rock, it always leads to the telling of another, and another.

I am  beginning to tell some of those stories here.  When I do, I plan to put my picture of a stack of rocks so that you will know, this is a special God-story when He "showed up and showed off".  I have gone back to and marked one already, see if you can find it.
----------------

Life Lesson:

• The older you get, the easier it is to forget dates and details of life ... make yourself a bowl of rocks!  Even if it is just a journal, or a blog... write it down!  One day it will be all that is left of the story, and if you don't document it somewhere it will be lost forever.

• Another plus to the rocks... when you are having a down day, or find yourself in a pickle, you can look to your bowl of rocks and see that the Lord ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS comes through for you!  There is NOTHING too big for our God!

Deuteronomy 10:21

 He is your praise; he is your God, who performed for you those great and awesome wonders you saw with your own eyes.

This morning I wanted to find a scripture about the Lord blessing the works of our hands... I know they are there, just not exactly where, so I did the trusty word search on Biblegateway.  There are several but

Deuteronomy 28: 12 "The LORD will open the heavens, the storehouse of his bounty, to send rain on your land in season and to bless all the work of your hands. You will lend to many nations but will borrow from none."

was the one I was looking for.  Gotta love it!

If you fully obey the LORD your God and carefully follow all his commands I give you today, the LORD your God will set you high above all the nations on earth. 2 All these blessings will come upon you and accompany you if you obey the LORD your God:

13 The LORD will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the LORD your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom.

There are a lot of promises that go with that "IF" :

•  3 You will be blessed in the city and blessed in the country.

• 4 The fruit of your womb will be blessed,and the crops of your land and the young of your livestock—the calves of your herds and the lambs of your flocks.

• 5 Your basket and your kneading trough will be blessed.

• 6 You will be blessed when you come in and blessed when you go out. 

• 7 The LORD will grant that the enemies who rise up against you will be defeated before you. They will come at you from one direction but flee from you in seven. 

• 8 The LORD will send a blessing on your barns and on everything you put your hand to. The LORD your God will bless you in the land he is giving you.

• 9 The LORD will establish you as his holy people, as he promised you on oath, if you keep the commands of the LORD your God and walk in his ways.

• 10 Then all the peoples on earth will see that you are called by the name of the LORD, and they will fear you.

• 11 The LORD will grant you abundant prosperity—in the fruit of your womb, the young of your livestock and the crops of your ground—in the land he swore to your forefathers to give you.

• 12 The LORD will open the heavens, the storehouse of his bounty, to send rain on your land in season and to bless all the work of your hands. You will lend to many nations but will borrow from none.

• 13 The LORD will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the LORD your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom.

21 Balaam got up in the morning, saddled his donkey and went with the princes of Moab. 22 But God was very angry when he went, and the angel of the LORD stood in the road to oppose him. Balaam was riding on his donkey, and his two servants were with him. 23 When the donkey saw the angel of the LORD standing in the road with a drawn sword in his hand, she turned off the road into a field. Balaam beat her to get her back on the road.


24 Then the angel of the LORD stood in a narrow path between two vineyards, with walls on both sides. 25 When the donkey saw the angel of the LORD, she pressed close to the wall, crushing Balaam's foot against it. So he beat her again.

26 Then the angel of the LORD moved on ahead and stood in a narrow place where there was no room to turn, either to the right or to the left. 27 When the donkey saw the angel of the LORD, she lay down under Balaam, and he was angry and beat her with his staff. 28 Then the LORD opened the donkey's mouth, and she said to Balaam, "What have I done to you to make you beat me these three times?"

29 Balaam answered the donkey, "You have made a fool of me! If I had a sword in my hand, I would kill you right now."

30 The donkey said to Balaam, "Am I not your own donkey, which you have always ridden, to this day? Have I been in the habit of doing this to you?"


"No," he said.

31 Then the LORD opened Balaam's eyes, and he saw the angel of the LORD standing in the road with his sword drawn. So he bowed low and fell facedown.

32 The angel of the LORD asked him, "Why have you beaten your donkey these three times? I have come here to oppose you because your path is a reckless one before me. [c] 33 The donkey saw me and turned away from me these three times. If she had not turned away, I would certainly have killed you by now, but I would have spared her."

---------------

In 1999, my niece Ashley was having her third child.  I had not been with her for the birth of her other two girls so I really wanted to try and be there for the third.  She was having it induced so we knew exactly when Savannah would be born.  I made my plans, but, there were things wrong with my car... air conditioner didn't work and something else just wasn't right so I took it in early that week for repairs.  When they called with a quote of over $5000 I told them I'd be there to pick it up, I couldn't afford that.  They told me "OK, but don't take a long trip in that car."   They didn't tell me what that meant, just that it wasn't safe to drive.  So, I didn't go to Louisiana that week.  I could have stood being without the AC but something else was making it unsafe ... ???... I didn't know what that was.

Early the next week I took my car to an independent mechanic a friend had suggested.  He plugged a hole in the AC for around $200 and replaced a 75 cent belt.  The $5000+ repair bill became $200+!!!  And, that 75 cent belt was the thing that had kept me from being where I wanted to be, when I wanted to be there!!!  ARGH!!

Friday of that week I got a call from my brother telling me that Tori, Ashley's oldest daughter, then 10 years old, was in the hospital and they didn't know what was wrong, but she could die!!!  I told him I would be there as soon as possible, dropped everything, and made the 8 hour trip to La, praying all the way.  By the time I got there they had diagnosted that she had ITP, a disease where the things in the blood that are suppose to kill off the bad things were also killing the good.  But, the good news was, Tori's blood count had gotten better so they released her from the hospital that night.  PRAISE GOD!

During that night Tori had a severe headache and threw up all night long.  The next morning, I drove Tori and Ashley to the doctor to see what was wrong.  Remember, Ashley had just had Savannah the week before and couldn't drive.  The doctor was very concerned and sent us to the hospital immediately to run tests ... It could be bleeding on her brain, a potential problem with ITP,  or, it could be meningitis.  The tests showed meningitis...in addition to the ITP!   Tori would need to stay in the hospital several more days and Ashley would have to leave her week old baby, Savannah, at home with her mom.

God is so good.  He had one grandmother taking care of Alex, the second daughter, another taking care of Savannah and I was there to drive Ashley back and forth to the hospital.  I was there when I needed to be there.  If I had gone the week before I couldn't have stayed another week because of work.  God had used a 75cent belt (my donkey) to have me exactly where I needed to be, when I needed to be there.

Life Lesson:

• Don't get mad at your donkey!  Whatever that little annoying thing is that is keeping you from being where you want to be, when you want to be there...there is a reason.

"In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps."  Proverbs 16:9

You may have read the following before but it never hurts to have a little reminder...

17-year-old Brian Moore had only a short time to write something for a class. The subject was what Heaven was like. "I wowed 'em," he later told his father, Bruce. It's a killer. It's the bomb It's the best thing I ever wrote." It also was the last.


Brian Moore died May 27, 1997, the day after Memorial Day. He was driving home from a friend's house when his car went off Bulen-Pierce Road in Pickaway County and struck a utility pole. He emerged from the wreck unharmed but stepped on a downed power line and was electrocuted.

Here is Brian's essay entitled:

" The Room.."

In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered with small index card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction, had very different headings.



As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read "Girls I have liked." I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was. This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.



A file named "Friends" was next to one marked "Friends I have betrayed." The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird. "Books I Have Read," "Lies I Have Told," "Comfort I have Given," "Jokes I Have Laughed at."



Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: "Things I've yelled at my brothers." Others I couldn't laugh at: "Things I Have Done in My Anger", "Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents." I never ceased to be surprised by the contents Often there were many more cards than expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived.




Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to fill each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature.




When I pulled out the file marked "TV Shows I have watched," I realized the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of shows but more by the vast time I knew that file represented.


When I came to a file marked "Lustful Thoughts," I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size, and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content. I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. An almost animal rage broke on me.



One thought dominated my mind: No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!" In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards...


But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it. Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh

And then I saw it. The title bore "People I Have Shared the Gospel With." The handle was brighter than those around it, newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand.

And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt. They started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room.. I must lock it up and hide the key. But then as I pushed away the tears, I saw Him.



No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to watch His response. And in the moments I could bring myself to look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own. He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes.

Why did He have to read every one? Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room.. He looked at me with pity in His eyes. But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to cry again. He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me.

Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files.. Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name over mine on each card. "No!" I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find to say was "No, no," as I pulled the card from Him.. His name shouldn't be on these cards. But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, and so alive.



The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood. He gently took the card back He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards. I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back to my side. He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, "It is finished."


I stood up, and He led me out of the room. There was no lock on its door. There were still cards to be written.

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

7 "But ask the animals, and they will teach you, or the birds of the air, and they will tell you; 8 or speak to the earth, and it will teach you, or let the fish of the sea inform you. 9 Which of all these does not know that the hand of the LORD has done this?  Job 12:7-11

About a month ago I bought two pansy plants.  I had a small container that I wanted to put them in for the inside of the house.  When I got home I realized that only one would fit so I planted the other one in a "dead" flower box outside.  I just barely planted it that is, I scratched a spot out of the pine straw and twigs and just stuck it in...barely deep enough to call it planted. 
blooming and beautiful (if you ignore its surroundings)  I didn't do a thing to help it live.... but God did. :-)

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  When God plants you in a place...THAT'S the place you grow and bloom...The conditions don't even matter if you are where you are suppose to be....But, if YOU choose (or if you don't leave a place when He says leave) ..you might end up looking like the first plant... there is no joy or peace if you are "out there" doing it your way, in a place he didn't lead or told you to leave. 

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  If you depend on people to take care of you they will let you down.  Even if they have good intentions, they will either forget to water you, or water you too much or tell you what they think is best for you (I thought it was best for the pansy to be inside, I really did...especially when it snowed!)  You can trust God to provide and protect you no matter what the "weather".

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  I watched the inside plant seeking the sun.  It grew taller trying to reach for any light it could get...and the flowers (when they were there) would turn their faces toward the window.  I would turn the plant around because it was leaning toward the window...when I did,  it wasn't long before they turned around.  That plant required sunlight to survive.  It was constantly struggling just to survive. It finally got too weak to even try anymore...it is now, just flopped over waiting to die.  The outside plant was surrounded by the sun, no struggles...the sunlight was just there.
  
  We are like the pansy...we require the son light and until we find him we struggle to just survive... once we find him and are living in his light, there is no more struggle.